hatman: HatMan, my alter ego and face on the 'net (Default)
( Nov. 1st, 2008 08:18 pm)
Do you live in an area with a high degree of superhuman activity? Are you looking to repair or even rebuild your home, apartment building, or office... again? Are you worried about what will happen the next time there's a battle in your neighborhood?

Call the Caped Contractors!

We'll repair, replace, or rebuild just about anything. And we'll do it with modern challenges in mind.

Live in Gotham? Constantly finding yourself needing to replace damaged eaves? We'll install dedicated grapple points on the side of your building. These tough, reinforced bars make for easy, secure grappling hook targets, so you-know-who doesn't have to latch on to your antique stonework.

Buying a new property in Metropolis? We'll do a thorough lead inspection and safely remove hastily and often shoddily installed lead shielding from the walls. Want to give something back to your city's hero? We can use that extra lead to build a radiation-proof bunker with built-in sun lamps and a leaded glass skylight.

No matter where you live, you'll want to check out our amazing reinforced, cushioned roofing! It holds up during rooftop fights of all kinds, and helps reduce the impact on the rest of the building. We'll even add in extra air conditioning fans, steam pipes, water towers, and other essentials to help keep everything running even when things get ripped apart, smashed, blasted, and just plain knocked around.

Starting over? We'll build with innovative new features like our patented crumple zones, designed to minimize damage and casualties when something - or someone - comes smashing through your building.

We offer a wide variety of options for small projects or large. How about shatterproof windows? They help lessen the damage from explosions, sonic booms, nearby ground impacts, and other hazards. They also protect against unwanted intrusions.

We can even work with you on custom alterations. We'll build secret compartments and passageways to your specifications, no questions asked! (Note: Due to city ordinance, we cannot build lead-lined enclosures in Metropolis without exterior windows.)

Whatever your needs, you need the Caped Contractors! Call 555-BUILD-SUPER today!
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