This is great! You need to find a meta-fandom or fantasy blog to post it on. Too fun.

I love the throw-away lines ... Who wants to deal with that kind of paperwork? Be sure to register your motif with the Guild. And, of course, you can always check with them if you have questions; that's what they're there for, after all. *g*

My favorite, though, was the suggestion to reinforce the air-ducts and make sure they all connect. So that's how that keeps happening! *g*

Thanks for sharing!